Where Have All the Manners Gone?

Where Have All the Manners Gone?

What? Huh? Move! Gimme a …, Hey can I …? Where oh where have all the manners gone? What ever happened to: Pardon me? I’m sorry, I didn’t hear you. Excuse me please. May I have? Those phrases are almost extinct for children today. You may still occasionally hear those words from adults aged 40 and older, but pretty much not anyone younger.

How long has it been since families all ate around the dinner table? Can you remember enjoying a meal when the person speaking wasn’t interrupted? People just knew not to phone during meal times; and if your phone did ring, there was no getting up from the table to answer the phone unless you thought it might be an emergency. Of course, during that time of polite table manners, Caller ID and answering machines weren’t around, so the caller would just need to call back another time. And shall we discuss long phone calls? You just didn’t phone people after eight o’clock at night, and certainly never past nine. It was just considered rude.

Sure more and more families are single parent homes and double income houses, and opportunities to sit around the dinner table are few and far between; but that’s no excuse not to instill good manners in your children. Elbows off the table, napkin in your lap, don’t talk with food in your mouth. Then there’s no one starts eating until everyone is served, and blessings are said in some cases. Now everyone sits down and starts wolfing food down their mouths all the while reaching over each other. “Please pass the salt” is rarely heard anymore. And back in that day, no one dared leave the table until everyone was done. If there was something urgent which caused a family member the need to leave the table early, the child always asked the parent, “May I please be excused?” No one says that anymore! Why not?

How many of you can remember growing up saying, “Can I…” and before any more words uttered past your lips, you were corrected to say “May I.” May I go to…? May I have… ? “Of course you’re capable, you can, the real question is do you have permission to, which is MAY I?”

Manners are a lost art. Sadly if the parents don’t use good manners, their children certainly can’t be held responsible if they were never taught, nor ever were led by example. It’s never too late to start calling people Sir and Ma’am or to use the magic words (that’s Please and Thank you, for those who have forgotten!) If all else fails and you just don’t know where to turn, start listening to people over 40, many of them still use manners, or trot to your local library and pick up a book. Heck, just Google “Manners” and see what you come up with!

Latest Updates

• Chronic fatigue syndrome linked to childhood trauma (AFP via Yahoo! News)
  Childhood trauma, including sexual abuse, emotional abuse and emotional neglect, was linked to a six-fold risk increase for chronic fatigue syndrome in adults, in a study published in the Archives of General Psychiatry.
  


• Study sheds light on deadly childhood cancer (Reuters via Yahoo! News)
  A gene involved in cell division also helps fuel a deadly childhood cancer called neuroblastoma and could offer a new way to develop drugs to treat the disease, German researchers said on Monday.
  


• Chronic Fatigue, Childhood Abuse Linked in U.S. CDC Study (Bloomberg)
  Jan. 5 (Bloomberg) -- Chronic fatigue syndrome , an ailment of unknown cause, may be tied to childhood abuse, according to psychologists at Emory University in Atlanta.
  


• CFS Linked to Childhood Trauma (WebMD)
  Experiencing serious trauma during childhood may increase a person's risk for developing chronic fatigue syndrome later in life, a new study suggests.
  


• Chronic fatigue syndrome linked to childhood trauma (Channel NewsAsia)
  WASHINGTON - Childhood trauma, including sexual abuse, emotional abuse and emotional neglect, was linked to a six-fold risk increase for chronic fatigue syndrome in adults, in a study published Monday in the Archives of General Psychiatry.
  


• Childhood Trauma And Chronic Fatigue Syndrome Risk Biologically Linked (Science Daily)
  Childhood trauma is a potent risk factor for development of chronic fatigue syndrome, according to a new study.
  


• Childhood friends older in dream (The Oklahoman)
  Q: In my dream, I am in a large, white, run-down house. I am with a few of my female friends from grade school, but we are all adults now. A man is trying to destroy the house by either blowing it up or setting it on fire. I end up in the house alone, and I put on my favorite childhood play-dress. It is too small when I remove it from the clothing trunk, but fits perfectly when I put it on. I ...
  


• Childhood trauma associated with chronic fatigue syndrome (EurekAlert!)
  Individuals who experience trauma during childhood appear more likely to develop chronic fatigue syndrome as adults, according to a report in the January issue of Archives of General Psychiatry, one of the JAMA/Archives journals. In addition, neuroendocrine dysfunction -- or abnormalities in the interaction between the nervous system and endocrine system -- appears to be associated with ...
  


• Biological link connects childhood trauma and risk for chronic fatigue syndrome (EurekAlert!)
  ( Emory University ) Childhood trauma is a potent risk factor for development of chronic fatigue syndrome, according to a study by researchers at Emory University School of Medicine and the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention. The study is published in the Jan. 5, 2009 Archives of General Psychiatry.
  


• Chronic fatigue syndrome linked to childhood trauma (TODAYonline)
  A flooded children's playground in Hamburg, Illinois. Childhood trauma, including sexual abuse, emotional abuse and emotional neglect, was linked to a six-fold risk increase for chronic fatigue syndrome in adults, in a study published in the Archives of General Psychiatry
  

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